I was having a discussion the other day and we started talking about Mr. Right. I’m here to tell you right now that Mr. Right is a myth. Like unicorns, trolls and other mythical creatures there is no Mr. Right.
In my years of dating and relationships Mr. Right is a myth. The word “Right” means “morally good” or “justified” and from my experiences with online dating I would definitely say my dating profile never included these words (maybe it should).
I prefer to call the man I want to have a relationship with and be a part of my life with my children as Mr. “I’m willing to put up with” or Mr. “He’s willing to put up with me.” The fact remains is that I have had many romantic encounters with supposed “Mr. Right” but then “Mr. Right” turns into “Mr. Troll,” “Mr. Unemployed,” or “Mr. Not for Me!”
Single Parents and Mr. Right
Being a single parent means that I will have to put up with certain things and choose not to put up with others. Same goes for the partner in this duo. It’s not as simple as just he and I getting along and putting up with each other but also how we integrate two families or just my family into that. None of that is easy. I’m experiencing that now and it requires a lot of patience, time and commitment. Without those three key things nobody is ready.
Mr. “Right and Ready”
After talking to a friend about Mr. Right she said a guy she used to date said he needed to be Mr. “Right and Ready.” I love this term. Many women today will use phrases such as “He is the One” or “He’s my soulmate.” When a woman meets a guy she wants to settle down with or get married she sees a project. However, Mr. Right and Ready is not a project. He doesn’t need to be changed after the honeymoon because what you see is what you get.
A girl will go through a ton of supposed Mr. Rights – but not Mr. Ready OR they may find a lot of Mr. Ready but no Mr. Right. Kind of like a guy friend of mine, the original Mr. Emotionally Immature and Mr. Not Right or Ready. Women would sleep with him and then move on and marry the next guy. Kind of like the movie Good Luck Chuck where Dane Cook is doomed to be that guy.
Mr. Ready can easily turn into Mr. Right and Ready but Mr. Right can never change into Mr. Ready so easily
The main difference is that Mr. Ready is confident in what he wants in his life and knows who he is. It’s just a matter of finding the girl capable of putting up with his ways and that he is willing to put up with. A friend of mine told me this:
Mr Ready means he is ready to share his life with someone and stop dating around. In most cases he has to decide he is ready on his own before he even meets you. In some cases he doesn’t decide he is ready until he meets Mrs Right, but if he makes the switch to Ready just for you it’s because he truly thinks you’re Mrs Right and doesn’t want to risk losing you. These guys are the true keepers. A very eager Mr Ready will imagine Mrs Right in the next girlfriend he gets, as several of my exes probably did to me and the girl they met right after me.
I’m not sure I really agree with this but parts of it are true. Mr. Ready finds a girl they are willing to put up with and if they are ready and she is also ready the timing is great. I would hate for a man to stay with me because he didn’t want to lose me. I would love for him to know that I’ll always be there for him. But that’s just me. At one point I was clearly not ready and I was truthful to the Mr. Rights and Mr. Readys of the world.
Mr. Right may take awhile before he can also be ready. He may not see how great he is yet or may have other realities of his life or goals to accomplish before he is ready. Don’t push this one. He needs to come to this realization himself.
Do you know a Mr. Right? How about a Mr. Ready? Have you ever been with a Mr. Right and Ready? And where are you in all of this?