The way we talk to each other has always said a lot, but messaging has turned our everyday language into a running record. A quick reply, a long email, even a throwaway comment can hint at how someone thinks and what kind of emotional space they live in. Sometimes the clues are subtle, and sometimes they are loud enough to make you pause.
Psychologist Charlotte Entwistle says certain messaging patterns can point to darker personality traits, including traits associated with psychopathy. Her focus is not on one awkward text or a single bad day. Instead, she highlights repeated language choices that create a clear pattern over time. In a world where so many relationships begin and grow through screens, those patterns can matter more than people realize.
One of the biggest red flags she mentions is frequent hostile or negative wording. That can include heavy swearing, sharp put downs, and angry phrases like “I hate this” or “I’m furious,” especially when they show up regularly and without much context. Another sign is a strong habit of emotional distance, where messages feel cold, detached, or oddly flat even during moments that would usually call for warmth. It is the overall tone that stands out, not a single blunt sentence.
Entwistle also points to an exaggerated self focus in texting. Someone who constantly centers “me,” “mine,” and “I” can come across as less team minded, especially when “we” rarely appears. Over time, that kind of language can reveal a lot about how a person views relationships. It can signal a preference for control, a lack of shared perspective, or simply a habit of putting personal needs first.
She is careful to underline that one behavior alone does not make anyone a psychopath. Plenty of people swear when stressed, vent when life feels messy, or write in a self focused way without any sinister meaning. The key is the combination of patterns and how consistently they appear. She suggests these clues can show up in words long before anything obvious appears in someone’s actions.
This is also why it is worth separating observation from diagnosis. Psychopathy is often discussed as a severe form of antisocial personality disorder, and it is linked to a higher risk of violent behavior, according to Cleveland Clinic. Still, most of us are not qualified to label anyone based on texts, and we do not need to. Paying attention to repeated negativity, hostility, and self absorption can be enough to guide your boundaries and protect your peace.
Have you ever noticed a texting style that made you rethink someone’s intentions or emotional maturity? Share your thoughts in the comments.
