A California mom has gone viral after sharing a quick car chat that says a lot about what kids actually hold onto during the holidays. Andrea Dahms filmed herself asking her 13-year-old daughter, Brinley, to name three gifts she received last Christmas. The setup was simple, but the response landed with parents everywhere who feel the annual pressure to buy more and more.
In the video, Andrea tells Brinley to list “three presents” from last year. Brinley pauses, then asks if her mom means gifts from their family, before admitting she can’t remember. There’s no drama in it, just the kind of honest blankness that only a teenager can deliver without trying to make a point.
Then Andrea switches the question. She asks where they went on a family vacation this year, and Brinley answers instantly, Lake Tahoe. That contrast is what made the clip take off, because it captures something many parents suspect but rarely see so clearly. The memory that sticks is not the item in a box, but the time spent together.
Andrea added her own message on screen, urging parents to ask their kids this before tossing one more thing into an Amazon cart. In the caption, she summed it up in a line that resonated with viewers, saying kids need presence more than presents. The video racked up more than nine million views, along with hundreds of thousands of likes and comments from people who said it felt like a needed reset.
One commenter wrote that kids want memories, not stuff, and said she keeps trying to convince her husband to normalize taking a trip for Christmas instead of going all in on gifts. The discussion quickly turned into a familiar holiday debate about tradition, money, and whether the stress is worth it. For many families, it also raised a gentler question about what children will remember years from now.
Speaking to ABC News, Andrea said she hoped the post would push parents to rethink their approach to gift giving. She explained that the moment stood out because Brinley didn’t hesitate to recall the experience, even though the gifts had already faded. Andrea also admitted she used to struggle with the sense that buying a lot was simply what parents are supposed to do.
She said her takeaway is that sometimes the effort and spending do not match what kids truly want, which is time, attention, and being together. Since the video, she shared that her family has talked about changing how they do the holidays, possibly swapping some of the shopping stress for a small getaway. It is not about canceling gifts entirely, but about putting the focus where the memories seem to last.
Would you rather spend your holiday budget on more presents or on a shared family experience? Tell me what you would choose in the comments.
