Guest Post by Alyssa Clarke
My ex-spouse and I found our son’s homework always a struggle to keep up. We did not seem too concerned or made any proper routine as far as handling our son’s school homework. Now, as a divorced parent I know how difficult it can become, as there is no clear definition on who should take charge. I found that my son’s school performance took a drastic downhill when my ex and I were going through the divorce.
What I, as a parent, was supposed to do when my son started gaining poor grades? I was thinking to discuss with my ex-spouse about the situation and how to make things easier for our son. This brought us to the issue of homework and how it could be regulated, as our son was torn between two homes.
Academic performance of a child
Divorce was unsettling for me and everyone, more so for my son whose whole world had literally come apart. He was torn between loyalty for me, as well as his dad and this naturally was taking a toll upon him. While my ex-spouse and I were busy shuffling divorce papers with the lawyers, we completely forgot the needs of our child. It is no wonder that our son started slipping in grades at school. He was bringing in bad reports from the teachers and it got me terribly worried.
You see, children feel more deeply than adults but they will not speak out, rather they become listless and lose interest even in their studies. At such a phase in life, with nobody to monitor his study hours, it is no wonder that my son went to school with incomplete or untouched homework, or not at all prepared for the day’s tests.
Keep the focus on the child
Parents need to realize that even if they are now divorced, they have a joint responsibility towards their children’s education and progress in life. My ex-spouse and I talked it over amiably and decided to keep an eye on our son’s academic performance. We pondered about how best to get our child’s school performance to improve. We decided to keep aside all differences and focus on our child, by being a positive support for each other as well as the child.
We started sharing our child’s school activities, such as meeting the teachers or taking turns to attend PTMs and setting the ground rules for disciplining.
We also set the routine for the child’s study hour, when to watch TV or play. We decided that the same rules and routine should apply in either of our house, as far as our son was concerned. This was to avoid confusing and disrupting our son’s routine.
We mutually laid out the rules not only for school time activities but for after school activities as well. It was important for both of us to let our son develop a disciplined attitude and responsibility towards his overall activities. Pretty soon, our son was doing well in school and he seemed more confident.
Thanks to the feeling of trust and stability which we conveyed to our son. I learned immensely that a confident and secure child will do well in studies because he/she will not feel neglected and rejected.
About the author: Alyssa Clarke is a blogger who is a strict follower of a healthy lifestyle. She enjoys writing on parenting and health related topics the most and is currently working on a post on Gi Joe Action Figures, the new rage in the kids’ toy world.
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