If you can’t find a decent guy through online dating, it’s easy to blame the apps themselves. You can tell yourself that men from dating apps only want hookups or that there’s no genuine guys online. But the statistics say something different…
Data indicates that online dating is now the most common method of meeting a spouse. Also, at this point, there are hundreds of millions of men using these apps across the globe. The odds suggest that at least some of them are great guys looking for loving relationships even if you’re just getting back into dating.
So, if you’re a woman who hasn’t found one yet, perhaps it’s time to explore how you can play the online dating game better.
Below are 7 of the most common mistakes that women make when using online dating apps. By avoiding these errors, you can increase the likelihood of meeting a good man online.
Mistake #1 Not trying
Perhaps you think it looks desperate and lame to actually try and write a compelling online dating bio. Maybe you’re too lazy to think of a witty and compelling message to write to your online crushes. It’s fine if you prefer to do your online dating this way.
In fact, most women with half-decent pictures will still rack up plenty of matches with a blank bio. They’ll probably still get date offers even when only writing one-word responses.
But will these offers be from the best guys on the platform? Will they be from men who have similar hobbies and interests as you?
You probably won’t land a date with these top-of-the-range guys if you’re not making it easy enough for them to choose you. The best guys on these apps have a lot of options, so you’ll need to actually try in order to get them to choose you.
A great start is to invest in professional photos. After that, take the time to write a bio that stands out from the noise. If you take the time to explain who you are in detail, you’re more likely to attract someone who loves that type of person.
If you reply to his messages (or god forbid actually message him first) in a way that makes it easy for him to reply, he’s more likely to prioritize you over his other matches. He’s also more likely to write interesting messages back to you.
Forget this nonsense that it’s unladylike to make it too easy for a man to date you. Men love it when you’re easy to talk to online – and you’ll boost your chances of connecting with the best guys when you do so.
Mistake #2 Using the wrong apps
There are two common mistakes that women make when choosing which dating app to use. They either blindly choose a mainstream app, (wrongly) believing that it’ll give them the best odds of finding a great guy. Or they take a chance with a lesser-known website, have a bad experience and vow never to try a niche dating service again.
There are some fantastic sites out there that do great the work for you to find the best option. We really like Beyond Age’s review of the top hookup sites for singles since they’ve done a lot of research and testing. Read one before creating a dating account.
There are plenty of great niche websites out there! If you’re looking for a man who has a specific attribute or personality trait, why not use a website that only specializes in that? Perhaps the user base won’t be as large as Tinder or Plenty of Fish, but it’s still more likely to be filled with your type of guys.
Mistake #3 Negativity
If you’ve had a horrible experience with a man from a dating app, it’s understandable that you’ll want to edit your profile to scare off other guys like that. It’s human nature to be more cautious and perhaps a bit aggressive to your other matches in the future.
Just be aware that you’re scaring off the good guys by doing this too and there are some great ways you can improve your dating results.
It’s really off-putting to see a profile rammed with everything you DON’T want in a man. It creates the impression that you’ll be moaning and complaining throughout the date too.
Some guys will ruthlessly plow forward with even the most hostile of online dating matches. But the best guys tend to give up and focus on someone more welcoming.
So try and put your negative online dating experiences behind you and remain positive in your bio and messages.
Mistake #4 Too many filters
Image manipulation has become so common in online dating these days. At this point, most men will have been burned by a woman who looks nothing like her photos. Once this happens, they tend to become a lot more cautious to not be fooled a second time.
If all of your photos are clearly filtered or edited, a lot of guys will pass on your profile altogether, especially if they have a lot of options.
So keep the dog ears and anime eyes on Snapchat.
Mistake #5 No body shots
If you don’t include at least one body shot, the experienced male online dater will assume you’re not fit.
If he’s not into that, he’ll ask for your social media profile or extra photos and conduct further investigation. That’s the best-case scenario. The worse case scenario is that he ignores your profile altogether.
Or even worse, he might meet you for the date only to leave early because he’s not attracted to your physique. Some men might be more forgiving, but isn’t it better to be honest from the start and to find a guy who likes you for you rather than trying to deceive him?
Mistake #6 Being too sexual
Yes, if you’re proud of your sexuality, you can absolutely show this off on online dating. However, this will attract more guys who just want you for sex.
If you’re looking for true lasting love, it’s better to keep your freaky side out of your profile at least. Show off your fashion sense instead of your ass cheeks for now. Give him a glimpse into your interests instead of into your cleavage.
Mistake #7 Being too closed-minded
The huge number of choices available to most women within online dating apps can actually be a curse. Many women fall into the trap of dismissing great guys because they’re not perfect.
If you’re physically attracted to a guy and you seem to get along, this should be all that matters. Stop passing up guys because they have a different taste in music or an ugly T-shirt in one of their pictures.
Your true love won’t be perfect when you find him. So, stop searching for perfection online. Focus on the things that truly matter to you instead.